Disclaimer: Just because I am at my wit’s end with TWO does not mean I don’t love being his mother. It simply means I’ll have something to hold over his head when he’s older.

So what you see here on your left is what it has come to. 

He’s fitful. I mean like really fitful. 

When he tries to go to sleep, he wiggles and wiggles and scratches the mattress and turns his head from side to side and eventually rolls over and scares himself. And screams. 

Then I turn him back over to his belly, and the process starts all over again. I have tried standing there and literally holding his butt down so he can’t roll over, but without fail when I leave the room, he turns right over and we start again. Sometimes it happens during his naps, but most often it happens at 3 a.m. and it makes me want to shoot myself.

As shown in this photo, this morning I attempted to wedge my son between the wall of his Pack N’ Play and a rolled up blanket … and when that proved to not be enough of a barrier (he shoved it out of the way like it was nothing), I added in a pillow from my bed. 

He’s locked in there good and tight. We’ll see what happens. I’d take a nap, but ONE is awake now and asking me for food. I’m fighting the urge to throw a pack of crackers at him and lock myself in my room.