My maternity suit reminds me of a tablecloth.

Today it occurred to me that maybe the best time to wear swimwear is when one is pregnant. 

You’re already fat. There is no need for a miracle suit to camouflage problem areas, because they are all a problem. It’s just straight up, I’m fat. And you can’t make fun of me because I’m pregnant. 

I mean, you CAN … but that would make you a bad person.

I enjoy simplicity.