This week, Husband and I had a series of arguments. Of course, I felt like he was wrong and I was right … until he told me he felt like I had been acting like a “Negative Nancy.” Burn.
Apparently, instead of telling him all of the cute and fun things I experienced in a day, I ranted about how effing hard it was. This made me pause. I don’t consider myself to be a negative person at all. In fact, I pride myself on my inner strength and ability to handle difficulty. The problem is, Husband is one of the people who gets to hear me whine about it in person … daily. The rest of you get to read about it.
If I were Husband, out working hard all day, I wouldn’t want to come home to THAT. What he said made me mad at first, and then it got me in check. I spent all of yesterday getting my shit together.
I read (in a book written by Dr. Laura — she may be crazy, but I like her work, and I find her encouraging) that as women, it is our responsibility to “shield our families” from our issues. They don’t need to know about our every insecurity, pain, struggle, and problem. That is why we have been blessed with mothers and girlfriends who will listen to us vent and offer advice.
This struck a chord with me. I realized I can’t vent to Husband without him feeling like he needs to fix it. Unfortunately, he can’t fix the stresses I am under at the moment. He can offer encouragement and that’s about it. Luckily for me, I have a network of girlfriends who are in similar places in life and they have been an invaluable source of advice and support.
Today, I am thankful for those women. I am also thankful for my Husband, who finally decided to tell me what he felt about something instead of just staring blankly at me.
Here is a quote sent to me from one of my friends. I just might post it in every room of my house. It’s so easy to lose sight of what really matters when I haven’t been allowed to poop in peace for several days in a row.