Today, while driving my new-to-me van for the first time and marveling at all the space, I was struck by the realization that I truly have everything I ever wanted. Today. I have it.
When I was younger I never would have dreamed that I’d want to be a full-time van-driving mother of three children under age 4, but here it is. It’s happening. I have become someone I never would have noticed before. Sometimes it hits me out of nowhere how blessed I am to simply be able to honestly say that I am happy.
I have a full life. A good life. But you know, a lot of people have everything I have and MORE and they are still not happy. You can be surrounded by bright and shiny things, but in order to be happy you have to notice and appreciate what you have been blessed with.
The people are what make life good.
Without my people, I would have nothing. I would have no reason to rush around in the morning to make sure they are fed, nothing to motivate me to keep the laundry under control or the house in order. No reason to try to keep myself healthy and strong so I can keep going. I would have no reason to think of anything other than ME. No reason to give. No reason to serve. No reason to live.
I spend a lot of time chasing after my 18-month-old (he likes to race into the bathroom and turn on the hot water faucet in the bath tub when I’m not looking … PLEASE PRAY FOR ME), and yelling at my 4-year-old (for doing things like waiting for me to chase his brother into the bathroom so he can find my scissors and cut things into tiny pieces), and feeling stressed out because I can’t seem to stay on top of my insane life.
But when I’m quiet, and I take the time to feel my third child thump-thump-thumping in my very tired womb … it hits me. My life, my children — it’s almost too much. We have nothing and we have everything. Isn’t it funny how life works.