Fantasizing.

Yesterday I shrieked, I am so sick of being fat!!!! to Husband in the middle of Target. It seems I have hit a new low.

I’ve taken to looking at old pictures of myself when I wasn’t 50+ pounds over my normal weight. Here I am on Christmas morning 2007, right after I got a positive pregnancy test for the baby that would become ONE. I have on no makeup and I’m wearing Husband’s sweats, but look at my arms. And my boobs for that matter.

They look so small.

I’ve been fantasizing about my weight-loss plan of attack after TWO gets here … and … also obsessively considering plastic surgery. Husband has agreed that once I’m done having children (TWO is not our last) that we can evaluate our budget and if we have the money (we likely will not), then I can have some things done. I do not take offense that he is supportive.

Let me just say here that I am not a fan of messing with one’s face or parts that aren’t truly, well, a mess. But I can assure you that after I lose all of the weight from TWO (I will. I will. I will. I will.), then possibly have more children and continue that cycle, I WILL BE A MESS

I dread hearing what my family will have to say. It’s not like you can buy new boobs without notice, though. And a new stomach, and possibly a little lipo. But I really feel that nothing is wrong with being One Hot Mother.

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