The Gravity Machine.

Sometimes I get myself roped into things by saying “yes” when I should probably ask more questions. Today was an example of that.

My gym just got a bunch of “Gravity” machines. If you are unfamiliar, and I bet that you are, this is what they look like:

I noticed them, but didn’t pay much attention other than thinking to myself that they looked not fun. There are signs on each one saying PLEASE DON’T USE WITHOUT PROPER INSTRUCTION so that gave me a good reason to avoid them. In fact, I have been avoiding all things related to weight-bearing exercise for well over a year. I’ve gotten into a good cardio routine and have been feeling like I could add something else in, but was putting it off because I have kids to wrangle and not being able to pick one of them up due to muscle soreness isn’t really an option. Except now I seem to have gotten myself into that exact situation.

Anyway, the nice people at the gym asked if I would be interested in signing up for a 4-week course to learn how to use the Gravity machines and for some reason I said “Yes!” instead of, “What EXACTLY is going to happen to me?” Had I the foresight to ask this question, they could have said “You’re going to want to die,” and I could have politely declined. But since I didn’t ask first … now I am $20 poorer and committed to three more sessions of hell.

I went on an internet search for pictures to show what I did, and apparently no one but me looks miserable whilst Gravity machining. See how the girl below is smiling? She’s such a liar. At this point in my workout I wanted to scream “I JUST HAD MY THIRD BABY!!!” at the top of my lungs so no one would judge me when I puked.


I’m 12 pounds away from pre-pregnancy weight and like a gazillion pounds away from where I would like to be, so if this damn machine is what will get me to the next level, then so be it. Now, please excuse me while I go lie down.

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