Suri’s Burn Book.

Oh man.

A friend recently texted me to check out this website immediately (www.surisburnbook.tumblr.com), and so I did. For anyone who has odd blocks of time on their hands and needs a distraction from real life, I strongly suggest you take a gander.

It also helps if you are one of those people who enjoy pop culture, and like to laugh at the expense of others.

RHONJ.

I’ve been recording the new season of Real Housewives of New Jersey for the past month or so, but never got around to watching any of the episodes until last night.

OMG. It. Was. Awesome. I watched the season premiere and was instantly sucked in. I could have easily sat there for several more hours watching the rest of them, but I want to ration them out. Like expensive chocolate candies. Actually, expensive chocolate candy is possibly the only thing that could improve my experience of watching this show.

I shall look into that.

I contest that the best cure for any ailment you may have (depression, boredom, PMS, pregnancy, feeling like a failure, thinking you might be crazy, etc.) is this show. Or really ANY of the Real Housewives shows … although New Jersey boasts a particular form of cray-cray that makes me feel extremely normal.

You don’t have to tell anyone that you’re watching it. You can keep it on the down low. It’s much cheaper than therapy.

I Know You.

(source)

I knew you were blowing smoke up our asses, Donald Trump.

I knew full well your so-called “consideration” to run for President was just a stunt. I mean really … let’s be serious. We all recognize that you’re a smart man, but Presidental material you most certainly are NOT.

This charade was quite obviously a ploy to get America on the Apprentice/Celebrity Apprentice train. As if the ratings weren’t already through the roof. You’re a greedy man, Mr. Trump.

Despite your obvious shortcomings, I’m still a fan of your show. No one can hold my attention like your hair can.

Ugh!

I do not wish to hear anything more from Charlie Sheen.

Ever.

I admit, I had a mild fascination at the beginning of his (seemingly-endless) downward spiral. Now … I just want it to stop. SURELY at some point, he will get arrested or overdose or check into rehab and not come out, right?

Mostly I just feel sickened by the fact that this man managed to procreate twin boys who are now two years old and caught up in the midst of whatever the hell he has going on in his home. How did he even have viable sperm? That is something I’ve spent too much time pondering.

My heart hurts for children who have wacked out parents. I normally try not to judge people who I know nothing about, but I judge him.

And his ex-wife wives.