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Neighbors.

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This afternoon I squeezed into a too-small bikini that I have absolutely no business wearing and lounged in the backyard while ONE played in his swimming pool.

Normally I would do my thing and just tell myself that most people aren’t home during the day. Normally, I tell myself that it doesn’t matter that look ridiculous and my son is screaming like a banshee … because no one can see or hear us.

Unfortunately, that is not the case. Not here at our new house. On one side lives an elderly woman, and on the other side is a retired school teacher who home schools her daughter. I doubt either of them appreciate the noise level. And certainly they don’t want to see me squeezed into something I shouldn’t be wearing.

I decided it’s better that we not try to pretend to be something we’re not, just for the sake of impressing the neighbors. They might as well know the truth right away. We are loud, we walk around semi-dressed, and we are home all the time. 

DUN DUN DUN.

There’s No Time.

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When I met Husband, he didn’t strike me as the type to do this, but he used to watch old episodes of Saved By The Bell. Not just occasionally. I mean every day.

Sometimes when I freak out, he makes reference to that episode where Jesse Spano takes too many caffeine pills and starts screaming “I’m so excited, I’m so excited, I’m so … SCARED!”

I don’t know about you, but it cracks me UP every time I think about that episode. If you haven’t seen it, I suggest you Google it immediately.  

I literally cannot remember the last time I felt so behind in every aspect of my life. Yes … I know. I just moved. I’m allowed to have a dirty house and unorganized bills. That doesn’t stop it from bothering me.

This morning I was sitting in my new living room watching the sun rise and I thought to myself, there’s never any TIME. I need about three full days by myself to work without interruption to get our lives in order. Since this isn’t going to happen, I guess I’ll just try to have our lives in order by Christmas.

What Day Is It? Where Am I?

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I am so … disoriented. 
I don’t know what day it is, what time it is, or where my blow dryer could possibly be. We are almost completely unpacked now in our new home and I have found this entire process so exhausting and absolutely insane that the only thing I can think of to do in order to return normalcy to my life is to write. And watch reality television.
Here are the highlights of our incredibly fast-paced relocation from Birmingham to Baton Rouge. In case any of you are wondering, I do not care to move again. Ever.
 
Here we are, fresh-faced before things got gritty. I think this was maybe Day One of packing. We had no idea the hell that we were in for. Or maybe we did, but we were in total denial. Which really, given the situation, is probably the best way to go.

We have a LOT of stuff. I wish I could explain the enormity. All I can say is, it took a truck this size, plus two carloads, to get it all to Baton Rouge. If you look really closely, you can see Husband.

Basically, we drove the kids down, spent a week painting and sprucing up our rental, and then Husband and I took a 24-hour trip back to Birmingham to load up our stuff and clean our townhouse so hopefully someone will buy it. It might not sound that bad, but it was brutal. I think it’s because of the children. They really do make everything more complicated. No offense to them.
Here I am, fueled by way too many 5-Hour Energy drinks.


Here is Husband, painting at our new house. He was delirious at this point. The smile is not real.
It’s a plain little ranch-style house, but it has so much potential to be cool. I really love exposed brick.


Finally, we got the place liveable and moved out of my parent’s house. We stayed there for a long time. I don’t know how long, because like I said earlier, I have no idea what day it is or even when this whole process started.

I was so tired of packing and moving at this point I wanted to cry just thinking about putting it all into the car and driving it to our place 20 minutes away. This is otherwise known as a low point.
Soon things got better though, because I LOVE to decorate. I mean really love it like I happily stayed up late at night to figure out the perfect place to put a lamp. I finally have a laundry room, a whole room just for dirty clothes … a mother’s dream.


And then I bought this shower curtain at Target which I really love. I decided to go for a Havana type vibe in the master bedroom and bathroom because my bedspread has always reminded me of that part of the world. Not that I have been there. Ever. 

ONE and TWO have a lot more space now, they seem to be adjusting well. 


 And now …we rest.




 

Moving … With Children.

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So it’s day three of packing, and we’re almost done boxing everything up. I would like to complain of being tired, but this is only the beginning of a month-long journey of tiredness so I just need to keep my mouth shut.
Our dining room has a narrow pathway through the middle of it and boxes are stacked almost to the ceiling. Husband still hasn’t fully recovered from being sick the other week so I have been drinking a lot of caffeine (my mother is shaking her head in disapproval right now) and packing like a maniac.
Now we just need someone to buy our house. Seriously.
As much as I have lamented over the lack of space and how tired I get of going up and down the stairs, I’m really going to miss our little townhome. It was the first place Husband and I bought together. This is the house we came home to after the birth of both of our children. We have had five Christmases here. It has been our home.

So while I am thrilled to start the next chapter in our lives, I have to take the time to bid this house a proper goodbye … along with all of the wonderful people we crossed paths with during our time here. We have been truly blessed. 

Okay Wow.

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As I type this, I am surrounded by boxes of our crap and our children’s crap and I am trying really hard to ignore it. We are moving in just a few days and attempting to pack and parent at the same time SUCKS.

Nevertheless, I plan to chronicle every step. Here is today’s progress so far …

ONE has spent his whole day trying his best to undo what we do. Here he is taking a little break with a neck massager.

And here is TWO. While I typed this, he developed a really disgusting snotty nose which needs to be addressed.

I just have to make it to Memorial Day weekend without hurting anyone. I just have to make it to Memorial Day weekend without hurting anyone. I just have to make it to Memorial Day weekend without hurting anyone.

True Story.

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This is day 5 of the house hunt and I have to admit it’s one of the hardest tasks I’ve undertaken lately. You might be thinking to yourself, “What is she whining about? How can it be THAT hard?“

Well, let me tell you why.

Yesterday I saw a house that not only had a multi-leveled, GINORMOUS structure in the backyard that was constructed for kitty cats to play in but there was a large piano in what I can only assume is the formal living room. I inquired about this and the owner said to me, “It comes with the house.”

I said, “Do what?”

He explained that it’s too much trouble to move it, so … it comes with the house. And so I explained to him that we already have a piano, you see, and it would be odd to have two pianos in one smallish living area.

“Nah! Just scoot this one over and put yours next to it!”

I bid him good day.