Today’s Obsession.

Posted on April 14, 2011 by Harmony

Publix brand pear vanilla lowfat yogurt. I don’t know why, but it’s really tasty.

I wish I had about 4 more containers of this stuff.

Names.

Posted on April 12, 2011 by Harmony

The naming process has begun.

I have an unusual name. We like uncommon names in our house, which we exhibited when ONE was born. In fact, we kept the name a secret until his arrival simply because we didn’t care to hear the feedback from other people.

People annoy me with their unwelcome opinions. But you see, once a baby is born and officially named, all (most) people will say is “oh!” or, “that’s nice!” if they don’t like the name.

I’ve started a list of names that we will NOT be naming this baby. I was inspired by my job … I talk to the good people of Alabama and Mississippi all day long. You can do with that what you will.

** Please don’t take offense if your name is listed here.

Granvil
Stedman
Ernest
Diamario
Harry
Jesus

My Weekend.

Posted on April 11, 2011 by Harmony

(source)

Here’s a summary of my weekend:

1. I purchased this dry shampoo for $8.99 at Target. I can’t wait to try it! I have a feeling it will be a life changer … much like the discovery of earplugs.

2. After searching for three hours (!!!) at several department stores for a new bra, I finally broke down and went to Motherhood Maternity, home of the $50 bra, where the nice lady measured me and kindly gave me my “correct size.”

3. My “correct size” can only be purchased at specialty stores.

4. It also starts with the letter “F,” as in, “FAT chance you’ll get out of this without looking like one of those National Geographic women.”

5. We watched the movie Shutter Island. DO NOT watch this movie if you are pregnant, or have children. It was awful.

6. All I can think about is my freakishly large chest, and that horrible movie.

7. I managed to get off my ass and make a batch of tuna salad. This marks the first thing I’ve cooked from scratch in exactly three weeks.

8. It’s entirely possible that I’ll eat all of it by myself.

Saturday.

Posted on April 9, 2011 by Harmony

And I leave you with this.

Sexyback.

Posted on April 9, 2011 by Harmony

I have been in a FOUL mood this week. I can’t seem to snap out of it. I really think it’s because of work-related exhaustion/stress … I can’t seem to catch up on anything in my life: sleep, laundry, groceries, my workload at the office. I haven’t cooked in weeks.

This morning I was getting ready to go to work … again … yes, on a Saturday … and things just came to a head. I snapped at Husband, was impatient with ONE, slammed doors and ran around like a mad woman. Our a/c is broken and it’s HOT. I was sweating and pissed off. It was one of those times where I feel like I’m doing everything, I’m too frustrated to ask for help, and I feel overwhelmed. It comes across as general bitchiness.

After I exited the house and got in my car, I saw that Husband had driven it last night and returned it with the gas tank on empty. That little thing just sent me over the edge.

I cried. Then I felt like a big fat wad of pathetic. I was wallowing in misery wondering when and how I was going to manage to snap out of it when something magical happened.

Justin Timberlake.

(source)

Sexyback came on the radio. I haven’t heard that song since the last time I worked out with my ipod. And that’s been a L-O-N-G time.

Justin is better than a hearty dose of Prozac. Here he is, waving at me.

Hi, Justin.

My Nemesis.

Posted on April 8, 2011 by Harmony

Several weeks ago I wrote a glowing post about some jeans that I found at A Pea In The Pod. I loved the first pair so much, my mother mailed me a second pair.

All was fine and good until last week when I discovered said jeans (both pairs of them) were getting … snug. I finally accepted that our relationship was just not going to continue to work unless I started hanging them up to dry. I have quite the collection of “hang-dry only” clothes that I’m actually too big to wear, but I just can’t say goodbye to them yet.

Fast forward to this morning.

I accidentally dried my jeans last night.

I was determined to put them on my body anyway.

DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS TO SQUEEZE INTO TOO-TIGHT PANTS WHILST OILED UP WITH COCOA BUTTER?

It’s a BITCH. But I did it.

I won. And I’ll be wearing a dress tommorrow.

IT’S A … BOY!

Posted on April 6, 2011 by Harmony

We’re having another boy! May I introduce to you … TWO.

We laughed hysterically after we left the ultrasound room, because ONE is such a boy and he’s such a handful. We can’t imagine having that times two.

I forsee a lot of bumps and bruises, screaming banshees, Lego wars, Superman capes, gallons and gallons of milk, and dirt in our future. I told Husband we have to move. We need land. And possibly a barn.

TODAY IS THE DAY!!!

Posted on April 6, 2011 by Harmony

This afternoon, we will find out the gender of TWO … if he/she cooperates. I plan to pump myself full of sugar before my appointment to ensure optimal movement.

Here’s what I’m looking like at 19 weeks.

I’m finding that the clothes that I’m wearing now are the clothes I was wearing at about 26 weeks with ONE, so by the middle of my 3rd trimester I’m going to have to buy new clothes because none of my old ones are going to fit.

Also, I have begun rolling out of bed. Literally.

Tuesday’s Thought.

Posted on April 5, 2011 by Harmony

Power Mama, Meet Super Mom.

Posted on April 4, 2011 by Harmony

Here they are. My new friends.

I look just like this lady when I put them on. Skinny everywhere, except for my tummy.

Okay … that was a lie. But I must say, these things are comfy. Getting them on my body was a struggle I wish I hadn’t undertaken in front of an audience (ONE and Husband sat staring while I wrangled myself into them), but … you live, you learn.

I also wanted to introduce to you “Super Mom.” This is is what will happen postpartum.

I’ll be topless with a cape.

Sara Blakely, I love you.

Yesterday, a terrible thing happened.

Let me preface this by saying that I am struggling to adjust to summer break. Struggling. Like … it’s good? But also horrible? Can something be good and horrible all at once? Because I’m pretty sure that is exactly what parenthood is.

Making the transition from having all three kids in school for 6+ hours per day (and working during those hours), to having them home all the time and trying to get my work done in addition to mothering in a loving fashion, is not going great. As I have already established in multiple blog posts from previous years, summer is effing relentless.

Pepper is obsessed with two things: outlets and babies. Here she is showing her baby doll the outlet in her bedroom. #multitasking

Thankfully, this year is somewhat easier than previous years simply because my children are getting older and more independent. Pepper will be 3 next week, so I think we’re finally on the upswing after a very dark time in the Valley of Motherhood.

Yesterday afternoon, we got home from playing at the park. The boys jumped out of the van, heard some kids next door playing, and asked if they could go over to play. I granted them permission and took Pepper inside. Her clothes were filthy — covered in layers of peanut butter and dirt — so I stripped her down to a diaper.

I ran to the bathroom with her trailing behind me, always my little shadow. And then, my mom called. She’s not feeling well and I can barely hear her on the phone. I was straining to understand what she was saying — did she just say she needed to go to the hospital?! — and naturally, my toddler got really loud at exactly that moment. As her shouting drowned out my mother, my stress level started to rise.

I went to my bedroom and closed the door. My daughter cried from the hall, and when she stopped, I was thankful. When I emerged only a few minutes later, the house was quiet. A panicky feeling started to rise in my chest, and then it felt like my heart stopped.

Just.

Stopped.

Beating.

Our back door was standing wide open.

Screaming her name, I ran outside. She was gone. Or hiding. Or missing.

I heard a woman’s voice — our across the street neighbor — yelling at me that she just saw a little girl cut through the fences in the backyard.

“She went that way, sweetheart! I was standing here watching her!”

I was barefoot and it did not matter. I ran. I ran until I found her. I couldn’t feel my feet. I couldn’t feel my body. All I could hear was my own voice screaming her name, and my heartbeat deafening my ears. That is what blind panic feels like.

My 2-year-old was wandering one street over from ours, wearing nothing but her diaper. She was holding a toy pet carrier with a little stuffed dog inside. I will never forget the way her face looked when she saw the horror on mine.

“NEVER AGAIN,” I said to her.

“Not with my dog?” she said.

“NEVER, EVER. Do not ever leave this house without a grown up,” I said, as I wiped away my tears.

I’m sharing this story to demonstrate how quickly children can disappear. How many times have I heard stories of toddlers wandering the streets and thought to myself, WHERE WAS THE MOTHER?

That mother is me. I was right there. It happened anyway.

I’m a damn good mom. I am capable. I am aware. I am not negligent. But children are fast. And sometimes quiet. And things happen. So today I’m hugging my babies tight, grateful for their safety, knowing that sometimes other mamas aren’t so lucky.

(If you liked this post, then you should follow me on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter!)

I Was That Mom

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