I have food hangover, so instead of trying to explain my holiday I’ll just SHOW you.
I made food. We ate food.
We slept, we ate some more. We drank lots and lots of Community Coffee to shake us out of our stupor. We shopped.
It was a blur.
And then … I asked my mother to take a family picture so I can send Christmas cards out this year.
Goodbye, Thanksgiving. It was fun.
Sad but true fact: I am sore from cleaning house.
Do you believe in kindred spirits? I do.
Here are two of my most important ones — meet my Hos. I know I shouldn’t call them that. They seem to like it though.
I LOVE these girls.
They listen to me gripe all day long, accept me when I am acting like a lunatic, and love me just the way I am. Quirks and all.
They don’t judge me … and for THAT, I am thankful.
We all need people who love us the way that we are. If you don’t have any Hos, Bitches, or kindred spirits in your life, you better find some — and FAST.
Dear Thanksgiving,
I love you.
Thank you,
Harmony
I have a love for all things fall and holiday-related, and a special fondness for Thanksgiving. I love this particular holiday because of what it reminds me of and what it stands for.
My extended family and I have started a tradition of standing in a circle (holding hands — cheesy, yes, but it adds a little something) before we eat, and we all have to share what we’re thankful for. Every year, tears are shed.
It’s awesome.
Yes … my husband married into a family who loves to “share.” I always feel a little sorry for him during these types of events. He usually gets stuck holding hands with me and a random uncle. Then he has to deal with the tears, and THEN he has to “share.”
There is something powerful in the action of speaking the words “I am thankful for ___.” This year, I have so much to be thankful for. I have everything that I need, and wonderful people in my life.
I’m also planning to be quite ambitious in the kitchen. Sweet potatoes are involved. Prepare accordingly.
Time for my Sunday night ritual … helping my husband with his manscaping.
It’s not what you think. Or maybe it is — who knows.
My job is threefold:
1. making sure he didn’t miss any spots on his head when he shaved it,
2. trimming up his neck hairs,
3. and waxing between his eyebrows.
I really think I should have looked into becoming an one of those people that wax faces for a living. You know, instead of working for an insurance company.
I found this at my local Hobby Lobby for $13.99 $7! It was 50% off.
Oh, how I love a deal.
I am extremely grouchy. I’m sure it’s hormonal. I was mean to my husband for no reason this morning. He didn’t even have a chance to do anything to warrant meanness.
Poor guy.
To cheer myself up, I am going to focus on positive things (and not the fact that I just baked chocolate chip cookies and ate four of them).
1. I bought a new rug for my foyer and I really like it. I got it at Walmart! They’re really stepping up their game.
2. I discovered a new wine that is SUPER cheap and really tasty. Actually, Courtney at howdoyoufoldafittedsheet has been telling me about it for awhile and I just got around to giving it a try.
Lucky Duck Malbec. YUM! You can see my cookies in the background … minus four.
And lastly …
3. THANKSGIVING IS COMING! My favorite holiday. I’m all fattened up and ready to go.
I started my Christmas shopping on November 17th. This marks the earliest day ever for me to start my shopping. Generally I always intend to start early but never do. Lack of funds and procrastination always stand in my way.
This year, I have big plans. I’m going to do it RIGHT. For once.
Today my attempt at potty-training my toddler was a failure. Probably because I’m not feeling great and he isn’t either. It was fun (I guess?), but after FIVE accidents and ZERO pee-pees or poo-poos in the potty I decided to give up and try again another day when he isn’t coughing with a low grade fever.
He’s napping now.
I should too.
Has anyone ever read this book AND tried the method on a child?
Does it work?
I ask because this weekend I plan to implement the plan and I’m NERVOUS.
I may chicken out.
That is all.
I learned some things, mostly for a second time, during my Girl’s Trip to Chicago. The things I learned weren’t exactly epiphanies since I knew them already … I had just forgotten.
I figured pointing out lessons learned would be more useful to the six of you that read my blog rather than blabbing about the gory details of our trip. No one wants to hear about that anyway. Especially my mother.
Here is an abbreviated list.
1. There IS a “right” way to hail a cab. Screaming “WAIT! WAIT!” whilst running toward it is not the right way.
2. The rule for tipping bellmen is $1 per bag.
3. Sometimes it can be hard to laugh at yourself … but embrace your quirks, and try to see the humor in your own odd behavior. It builds character.
4. The local 7-Eleven probably has whatever it is that you’re looking for.
5. Never travel without band-aids, earplugs, and a flask. Even if you don’t end up needing them, all are good to have on hand.
6. Good friends are a huge gift. People who think you’re fun to hang out with AND accept you (with all your quirks)?! A MIRACLE.
7. Anonymity is awesome.
And as a side note … buying new shoes and wearing them for the first time on a trip is a terrible idea. I was so excited about my Keens and they would have been perfect (in an old lady way), had they not squeezed the life out of my feet.
Nothing a few mimosas couldn’t fix. Cheers!
Yesterday, a terrible thing happened.
Let me preface this by saying that I am struggling to adjust to summer break. Struggling. Like … it’s good? But also horrible? Can something be good and horrible all at once? Because I’m pretty sure that is exactly what parenthood is.
Making the transition from having all three kids in school for 6+ hours per day (and working during those hours), to having them home all the time and trying to get my work done in addition to mothering in a loving fashion, is not going great. As I have already established in multiple blog posts from previous years, summer is effing relentless.
Pepper is obsessed with two things: outlets and babies. Here she is showing her baby doll the outlet in her bedroom. #multitasking
Thankfully, this year is somewhat easier than previous years simply because my children are getting older and more independent. Pepper will be 3 next week, so I think we’re finally on the upswing after a very dark time in the Valley of Motherhood.
Yesterday afternoon, we got home from playing at the park. The boys jumped out of the van, heard some kids next door playing, and asked if they could go over to play. I granted them permission and took Pepper inside. Her clothes were filthy — covered in layers of peanut butter and dirt — so I stripped her down to a diaper.
I ran to the bathroom with her trailing behind me, always my little shadow. And then, my mom called. She’s not feeling well and I can barely hear her on the phone. I was straining to understand what she was saying — did she just say she needed to go to the hospital?! — and naturally, my toddler got really loud at exactly that moment. As her shouting drowned out my mother, my stress level started to rise.
I went to my bedroom and closed the door. My daughter cried from the hall, and when she stopped, I was thankful. When I emerged only a few minutes later, the house was quiet. A panicky feeling started to rise in my chest, and then it felt like my heart stopped.
Just.
Stopped.
Beating.
Our back door was standing wide open.
Screaming her name, I ran outside. She was gone. Or hiding. Or missing.
I heard a woman’s voice — our across the street neighbor — yelling at me that she just saw a little girl cut through the fences in the backyard.
“She went that way, sweetheart! I was standing here watching her!”
I was barefoot and it did not matter. I ran. I ran until I found her. I couldn’t feel my feet. I couldn’t feel my body. All I could hear was my own voice screaming her name, and my heartbeat deafening my ears. That is what blind panic feels like.
My 2-year-old was wandering one street over from ours, wearing nothing but her diaper. She was holding a toy pet carrier with a little stuffed dog inside. I will never forget the way her face looked when she saw the horror on mine.
“NEVER AGAIN,” I said to her.
“Not with my dog?” she said.
“NEVER, EVER. Do not ever leave this house without a grown up,” I said, as I wiped away my tears.
I’m sharing this story to demonstrate how quickly children can disappear. How many times have I heard stories of toddlers wandering the streets and thought to myself, WHERE WAS THE MOTHER?
That mother is me. I was right there. It happened anyway.
I’m a damn good mom. I am capable. I am aware. I am not negligent. But children are fast. And sometimes quiet. And things happen. So today I’m hugging my babies tight, grateful for their safety, knowing that sometimes other mamas aren’t so lucky.
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Modern Mommy Madness 