But First …

You guys. Please don’t give up on me.

I used to blog almost DAILY. Now I’m down to like one post a week. What the hell has she been doing?! I bet that’s what you’re wondering. If you’ve even noticed … and I’m pretending that you have.

What the hell have I been doing?!

What the hell have I been doing?!

I don’t know what the hell I’ve been doing. I guess I’ve been busy being a mom and a mediocre member of the PTA.

I was sick for awhile. I looked like this for so many days in a row …

I don't know why I watermarked this photo ... is anyone really going to want to steal it? No.

I don’t know why I watermarked this photo … is anyone really going to want to steal it? No.

… That my three-year-old drew a picture of me. There’s an uncanny resemblance.

This is what I look like, apparently.

This is what I look like, apparently.

It’s Friday, bitches! And that means that tonight I get to check out of my usual duties, have a big glass of wine, and have Virtual Happy Hour with YOU!

But first … I have to go get a vaginal ultrasound.

It’s gonna be a great day.

(If you liked this post, then you will LOVE I Still Just Want To Pee Alone! Click here to find out more!)

Anonymous Reader Photo

A friend suggested I begin something called “Anonymous Reader Photo,” and I didn’t just think yes, I thought HELL YES, THAT IS BRILLIANT.

From now on, I’ll be accepting anonymous (or not, whichever you prefer) photos from my readers to post for the enjoyment and entertainment of others! You can e-mail them to me at modernmommymadness@gmail.com or send them via social media.

If you follow me on Instagram, then you already know that I’m a huge fan of kid art. My anonymous friend sent me this picture of her daughter’s latest creation, two smiling suns holding hands. It makes me smile.

Two happy suns holding hands.

Two happy suns holding hands.

Make sure to follow Modern Mommy Madness on Facebook and Instagram! I’m probably supposed to love Twitter but I kind of hate it … #sorrynotsorry.